posted 4th August 2025
5-7 minute read
Sometimes the most important lessons come wrapped in the experiences we’d rather not have.
I used to pride myself on being able to push through anything. Tired? Have another Diet Coke. Overwhelmed? Work later into the evening. Body asking for rest? I’d no time for that, ignore it and keep going. For years, this approach seemed to work. I was productive, reliable, always there for my team, my family, everyone who needed me.
Then my body taught me a lesson I couldn’t ignore.
During my recovery from breast cancer I discovered the difference between tiredness you can push through and fatigue that stops you in your tracks. The treatments, combined with my body’s healing process, created a new reality: when I had reached my limit, that was it. Not “I need a Diet Coke and I’ll be fine” exhausted, but “I physically cannot take another step, I cannot even think straight.”
For someone who had spent decades overriding her body’s signals, this was a profound wake-up call. My body had been trying to communicate with me for years - whispering, then speaking, then shouting - but I had become expert at not listening. Now it was setting non-negotiable boundaries, and I had no choice but to learn a different way.
The Signals We Ignore
How many of us have become fluent in the language of pushing through? We’ve learned to override the subtle signals our bodies send us throughout the day. The slight tension in our shoulders that’s reminding us to stretch. The flutter of anxiety that suggests we’re taking on too much. The way our energy dips at certain times, asking for rest rather than stimulation.
We’ve been taught that productivity means consistency - the same energy output regardless of how we feel, what our bodies need, or what life is demanding of us. But this approach treats us like machines rather than the complex, cyclical beings we are.
Energy Has Rhythms
Unlike time, which moves in straight lines and equal increments, energy flows in waves. We have natural rhythms throughout the day, the week, the month, the seasons. We have periods of expansion and contraction, times when we’re naturally more creative or more reflective, moments when we’re energised and others when we need to restore.
When we learn to work with these rhythms rather than against them, something remarkable happens. We become more effective, not less. We produce better work with less effort. We feel more aligned with ourselves and less like we’re constantly swimming upstream.
The People-Pleasing Trap
Many of us, particularly those in caring roles or leadership positions, have developed a pattern of putting everyone else’s needs before our own. We say yes when we mean no. We stay late to help a colleague when we’re already exhausted. We take on extra responsibilities because we don’t want to disappoint.
This pattern often stems from good intentions - we genuinely want to help, to be reliable, to be valued. But what we don’t realise is that by consistently overriding our own needs, we’re actually diminishing our capacity to serve others well. We become increasingly depleted, less present, and ultimately less effective.
Learning to Listen
The shift from time management to energy management begins with learning to listen to your body’s wisdom. This isn’t about being self-indulgent or lazy - it’s about recognising that your energy is a finite resource that needs to be managed thoughtfully.
Start by noticing:
>What time of day do you feel most alert and
creative?
> What physical sensations signal you’re approaching
your limit?
> When does your energy naturally dip?
> What activities drain you, even if they seem “easy”?
> What genuinely restores you (not just distracts
you)?
> How does your body communicate different types
of tiredness?
The Art of Energy Allocation
Once you begin to understand your energy patterns, you can start to make more conscious choices about how you spend this precious resource. This might mean:
Scheduling your most important work during your peak energy hours, rather than filling that time with meetings or admin tasks.
Recognising that some activities give you energy whilst others deplete you, and finding ways to balance these throughout your day.
Understanding that “no” to one thing is “yes” to something else - often something more aligned with your values and priorities.
Building in recovery time before you’re completely depleted, rather than waiting until you’re running on empty.
Permission to Honour Your Limits
Perhaps the hardest lesson for many of us is that our limits are not weaknesses to be overcome - they’re information to be respected. When we honour our boundaries, we’re actually creating the conditions for sustainable performance and genuine wellbeing.
This doesn’t mean becoming precious or unreliable. It means becoming more intentional about where you invest your energy, more present when you’re engaged, and more honest about what you can realistically sustain.
The Ripple Effect
When you begin to manage your energy rather than just your time, something interesting happens. You become more effective, more creative, more present. You show up as your best self more consistently. You model healthy boundaries for others, giving them permission to do the same.
The people around you benefit from your renewed energy and clarity. Your work improves because you’re doing it from a place of alignment rather than depletion. Your relationships deepen because you’re more present and less resentful.
Finding Your Rhythm
This journey requires patience and self-compassion. You might have spent years - or decades - ignoring your body’s signals. Learning to listen again takes time. There will be moments when you slip back into old patterns, when you say yes when you mean no, when you push through when you should rest.
That’s part of the process. Each time you notice, each time you choose differently, you’re rewiring old patterns and creating new ones. You’re learning to trust that your body’s wisdom is not an inconvenience to be managed, but guidance to be followed.
Your Energy, Your Choice
Your energy is yours to steward. You get to decide how you spend it, when you restore it, and what deserves your best. This isn’t selfish - it’s essential. The world needs you at your best, not your most depleted.
Sometimes it takes a health challenge, a burnout, or a life transition to teach us this lesson. But you don’t have to wait for your body to force the conversation. You can begin listening now, honouring your rhythms, and managing your energy like the precious resource it is.
The time will pass anyway. The question is: how do you want to feel as it does?
If this strikes a chord with you, know that you don’t have to figure it out alone. Learning to honour your energy and work with your natural rhythms is transformative work, and sometimes we need support to make that shift. I offer free 20-minute discovery calls - no pressure, just an opportunity to explore what this might look like for you.